Canyon

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I can feel the edge right under my feet

I am now conscious after such a long time

Shall I fall right now or stay still, incomplete?

 

I was safe and risking it seems to be a crime

My legs are shaking – there’s no one around

What if you don’t catch me, will I be fine?

 

I’m struggling to handle these feelings I found

I fear the way you filled the empty space

My heart beats so fast I can hear its sound

 

I’m trying to bring the memory of your face

Is it worth jumping and loosing myself?

I don’t know what to do, my brain’s someplace else

 

I’m fighting, I’m crumbling, and I’m losing my health

Without the safety net I shall fully live at last

Don’t want the big fame, don’t care about wealth

 

Nothing exists no more, love took over so fast

It’s time to fall into the canyon in my heart

I’ll spread my arms and say ‘goodbye’ to the past

 

The truth is we should never be apart

When it comes to love no woman can be smart

 

 

Longing

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In the jar of monotony I fell in so deep

Forgot how it feels to hold loving hand

Never stood still since I left my homeland

So far from loved ones my heart fell asleep

Did not want the pain, did not want to weep

My dream fell apart, that’s not what I planned

Never intended to build castles in the sand

I struggled I battled I started to creep

 

Now I still yearn but I found my way

I found what I needed I relieved my pain

I know I am on the right track today

I’m brought back to life, I’m hopeful again

Where I am right now I will always stay

Thanks to you my friends – Happy I’ll remain

 

Ambrosia

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I’m like a magician

I steal your dreams and smiles

And fill my pockets with them

To bring it home

And fall asleep

With them hidden under my pillow

Don’t ask me

What am I going to do

When you leave me

Ask me

What am I going to do

If you are never going to come back

Can’t you see my thirst

When you look into my eyes?

Don’t you know my dreams

When I fall asleep with my head on your shoulder?

I want to bribe the time

To make moments last longer

And make the days taste sweeter

It doesn’t matter you can’t be mine

It matters how many times you were there

Just for me…

I’m like a pot

I let you drink delight from

Until you get dizzy and faint.

Abbadon

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You’re like a fallen angel with a broken wing

Your eyes never see or notice any disaster

Simply because you don’t worry about a thing

Risk is your advisor and Dishonesty your master.

 

You hide your face behind dark mask and a hat

You blink your eyes and smile with grace

You’re not going to fool anyone with that

Not me, not yourself, not a whole human race

 

I’m knocking on your heart’s door, anyone there?

Some decency maybe, remains of your soul?

Your true colors underneath costumes you wear

Abandon them, they won’t let you breathe at all…

 

But there’s still hope, there’s still tomorrow

You can rescue your soul and let it shine

You won’t hurt anyone, won’t cause any sorrow

Be yourself, be truthful and then just be mine

When I got letter from You

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It’s 4.30pm in Preston,

Another cloudy but warm Thursday.

It’s 2010 and I’m sat on the floor in the attic.

I take my eyes off the envelope in front of me

and smell the summer breeze.

I can’t bring myself to read it, it’s too hard.

Even gentle waves on the river, I can hear through the open window,

won’t calm me down.

The door slams downstairs and I immediately jump up

and run barefoot. I don’t care that the carpet is still dirty

from the Saturday’s party.

I give Darla a hug , her hair is still wet from the rain

and it leaves a big dark stain on my new silk blouse.

She follows me into the kitchen for a refreshing glass of Dr Pepper

and we both agree to go for a walk –

– it seems like a perfect way of running from my fear,

that’s still lying on that cold attic floor waiting for me to face it.

We walk towards the park and talk about Darla’s new boyfriend

and other trivial things, but I’m struggling to take my mind off the letter.

On the way to the park we nip to the small shop on the corner of Taylor Street

and buy couple of bottles of Corona and a box of Menthol Pall Malls.

I instantly open the packet and light a cigarette

thinking about the show I saw earlier on You Tube.

It was a comedy and the content was rather weak but I remember this guy

claiming that men have a ‘nothing box’ in their brains, and that they can

run into it whenever they want.

At this moment in time I wish I had a ‘nothing box’ in my head.

The sun begins to set and as we take the last sip of, already warm, Corona

we start making our way back home.

It’s almost 7 and I feel restless. As we walk into the house I hear my friends’ excited

voices in the kitchen, but I don’t stop, I run upstairs – suddenly impatient.

I sit on the freezing cold floor and start reading. My hands are shaking and I can hear

Byórk’s ‘Army of Me’ being played in the room downstairs.

And then, just like that, my world falls apart.

Bridge

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Do you remember those stars?

Their sharp almost unreachable arms

Pierced my heart so many times

It’s now numb from sorrow.

You’re still here…

Not physically,

But you are.

Everyday…

Every second..

When I rewind the frames of my memory

Or when I sail on the river of my thoughts

Every snapshot

And every flash of light

Is you.

Do you remember the delightful mornings

On our beloved fields of gold?

Or our passionate dance

vibrating in the darkness?

Or the whispering nights

Interrupted  by the melody in our ears?

Do you remember when us two

Became one?

One perfect unity

Floating to the rhythm

Of the pulsating dance floor.

But this picture fades away

With every drop of time.

And as long as the rest of hope

Holds the bridge between us

There’s still a way back…

I’m scared

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I’m scared about you
I’m scared about the wind
I’m scared about someone’s life
I’m scared because I tend to

To blow the candle
And look into the future
Ask myself a question –
– What’s next, where to follow?

To know the truth
To be blissful and learn
Not to be scared to carry on
Not to be scared to live.

I’m scared about you
I’m scared about the wind
For it to blow your dreams
And for you not to understand what you’ve had.

Fate

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Two ends of the world.
The farthest corners of the Earth.
Two people.

A girl with golden hair
Shiny blue eyes
Good heart
And pure soul.

On the other side
A boy with chestnut eyes
Dark curls
And brave spirit.

They wait for love to come.
Even thought they’re still children
They believe in destiny.

Maybe one day
Their eyes will meet forever
Maybe their hands
will meet in eternal connection

Maybe their lips
Will touch softly
And their hearts
Will beat a little faster together

Maybe that will be
Maybe… If only
It’s written in the stars.